taking it all in...

As I was driving into work the other day, I remember saying a prayer to God.

God, you know our needs even before we speak them.  You know mine, please provide for the need - and at the same time renew my heart and mind so when I receive your provision - my actions will prove to benefit You and Your Will...not mine.

How often we ask things of God, and how often He provides.  I think he provides more than we know.  However, if we do not ask him to change our hearts and minds, we can waste his provisions on what we want.....what we 'need', not necessarily on what He wants, want He needs us to do.

Recently, I wanted to get a group together to go back to Feed My Starving Children and pack some meals. I scoured through the site for a date/time that would work for most - and reserved my spot.   Usually with Feed My Starving Children you go, you pack, and you leave a donation (if you can).  However, due to the increase of need around the world, they are asking that for some of the packing time slots, the individuals all donate 20$ to use these slots.

At first I thought, oh no - I wont be able to get a group of people together if they have to pay 20$....then my heart was checked......

I had to be honest, "I" was shocked at the 20$....seriously Heather?  20$?!?  How often do you throw 20$ on something without even a thought??  Makeup, lunch out, a shirt?  What a revelation of my heart this was.

To that I realized my priorities - even though they have come a LONG way....still have a long way to go.

What do I do with God's provisions?  Do I ask, then do as I see fit?  Or, do I take the 'needs' of the whole into account?

Thank you God for this revelation, Thank you for revealing a side of  my heart that still needs to be softened, and a mind-set that is still based on the 'world' and not You.

settling in

It has now been two weeks since I jumped into my current life adventure.  Every day I feel so blessed to have been given this opportunity.

As I look around my office today, still bare and empty, with only a couple minor parts of me on my desk - I take it all in.

How did this happen?  Two months ago, I would have never even imagined this would be my place....my spot on this earth.

My mind is flooded with strings of thought, moments in deep contemplation - sometimes melancholy - of my life journey so far.

There have been many, many bumps in the road, highs and lows, struggles caused by others actions - as well as struggles caused by my actions.  I have been hurt, and I have hurt.  I have been loved, and I have loved.  I have laughed...and been laughed at.

However, all of it....every moment...was building this person...this me that I am today.

Far from perfect, I come completed with scars that are a reminder of a painful past - that have become a badge of strength.  Not by my strength, but the strength God provides - even when you may not ask for it - or you are too weak to speak - He looks down on you and just provides.

Here I am.  This imperfect, flawed person - undeservedly blessed by God.  I may never understand why, but all I can do is......

Take His blessing and in turn bless others
Take His forgiveness and forgive others
Take His strength and be strong for others

but, above all......take His love.....and love others.

knowing your now

I recently started a new devotional. 

Let me just say really quick....youversion.com....you absolutely rock!!

It is a Rick Warren devotional, and it could not come at a better time.  The topic....Focus Your Life.

"The next ten years can be the greatest of your life.  They can become a Decade of Destiny, where your life is focused and, as a result, you're able to make an impact in all you do."

I love this devotional as it is dealing with things that have been on my heart lately.  Change!

I love that it reiterates the need to "Know Your Now"...that has become my mantra.  For so long I avoided knowing my now.....I buried my head, not wanting to acknowledge my true reality.

For years (and years) I would tell myself I did this out of self-preservation.  I could not change everything that needed to be changed, so why even try?

I felt helpless, scared, a failure.  So, I just would 'pretend' it was not there, not happening, that it didn't matter.

Oh, what a trap of the enemy that is!  If he can convince you to build your own prison, and stay in it - what a victory for him!

It was not until I finally acknowledged that without God all of my 'fears' would become reality.  All of my 'try's would fail, all of my attempts would not be enough to change.

With God, however - you realize you have been looking at the world upside down.  You have been living in a prison of the enemy.  You have bought into all his lies.

With God, you see that YOU do not need to be anything on your own...He is with you.

I read an article by Joni Eareckson Tada once where she said that there are days she can't even bear to get out of bed.  She is overwhelmed, sad, weary.  And, on those days she calls out to God and says.....

I have absolutely no strength of my own today, please give me Your strength God!

How wonderful is it that we can call on our God, the creator of the universe, when we are weak and weary and He will bring us Peace, Strength, and Love.

So, today as I venture out to wrap up the second to the last day of my current life chapter, I will go out 'Knowing my Now".

I will ask myself....

Where am I now?  Spiritually, Financially, Emotionally, Physically

Then ask God....

Where do YOU want me to be?

Three things I have learned that have helped me the most on my journey in, out and around my comfort zone.

1. Know Your Now
2. Ask God where He wants you to be
3. Remember, if you sincerely ask for His Will to be done....no matter what that is.....you won't be disappointed.

Countdown in 5.........

The countdown has begun!  There are three reasons why this week is going to be epic!

One - It is the last week that I will be working in the Corporate world.

Two - It is the last week before Convoy of Hope.

Three - It is the week that my Son will be on his first AIM trip.

However exciting, crazy, strange, and scary leaving my current job is for other ventures - the other two highlights for this week far outweigh this in my mind.

Convoy of Hope

There will be NINE (9) simultaneous Convoy of Hope outreaches going on through the Phoenix Metropolitan area this Saturday!  Each outreach is expected to reach 2,000 + children and their families - at least!


Convoy of Hope from OneStone Media on Vimeo.

I fee so blessed to be able to be a part of this amazing outreach to my community.

AIM Trip

My Son will be taking part in the youth Ambassadors in Mission (AIM) trip this week.  Even though he will be staying in Phoenix, he will be out working in the community every day for five days with over 500 other students from around the nation.

They will be working with multiple host churches from the Metropolitan area to help new church plants as well as help revitalize existing churches, they will participate in community service, sidewalk Sunday Schools, and will culminate with the Saturday Convoy of Hope outreach as well.

What a banner week for this family!  I am so excited to see what God will do in the lives of the people who will attend these events, be ministered to, provided for, and mainly LOVED!

I can't think of a better way to kick off the next chapter in my life, and see what God has in store for me next!

Blessings everyone!