Leap of Faith

"Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step."  ~ Martin Luther King Jr

 

Oh how I wish the reward of having faith is as quickly revealed as it is in this video below.  Who remembers Indian Jones and the Last Crusade when he has to literally take a 'step of faith' off a cliff?

I love the analogy of this video. 

First he sees what looks like an insurmountable task.  To get from point A to point B without dying first.

Then he remembers, 'Its a leap of Faith'.  However it does not bring peace on his face or ease his anxiety....he still has to 'take' that step of Faith.

Knowing you have to take a step of faith and doing it are two different things. 

While you know you have to, the reality ...... or what we perceive as the reality is staring us in the face.  And, what we have to do, in Faith, can seem illogical or even absurd at times.

Then you do it.  You take that step, and you don't fall.  The relief, the exhale of gratitude!

But its not done yet.  You still have to walk on the path that Faith lead you.

So many times in my past, I go so far as to take the step of faith, and begin to walk it - then at the first loose rock, or slippery gravel - take my eye off of the One who not only put me on this path but directed my foot on that first step.  Or I become tired of the path, it seems so long, too hard. 

Then I abandon it.  I turn around and return to where I came from, or worse just jump off and end up with personal turmoil and problems that were never intended.

This video clip, this reality is mine right now.  I took a step of faith, and I am confident that it is the step that God directed me to take through prayer.  However, there have been attacks along the way.

Fear rises up....what if 'this' happens?  What if 'that' happens?  My mind becomes obsessed with contingency plans, and the pit of my stomach begins to sour....just at the mere idea that something might go wrong.

Then I realize.  Yes, those fears are valid.  Something 'might' go wrong.  However, I am not alone.  As long as I stay on the path that is set before me, I am never alone.  

It is so cleaver how the enemy of you and I knows exactly what buttons to push.  And, for a moment or two we may allow him to take us there.  But when we are there, the reason it is so scary, so frightening, so bad.. is because you envision yourself...alone...trying to figure out what to do...by yourself....and then failing....on your own.

Isolation and Fear

Those are his weapons.  However, we are not alone.  We are never alone with God, and He does not give us a spirit of Fear.

So when you are faced with stepping out in faith, and you are caught up in the fear of what 'might' happen.

Stop.

Pray.

Listen to God.

Everyone would have understood if Ruth decided to stay in Moab, but she showed great faith by going to Bethlehem. By taking that step forward she placed herself in a vulnerable position where she had to trust God to protect her, to open doors and to provide for her. Interestingly, it was this very move, this very step of faith, that opened her to the relationship with Boaz, who became her husband.
When we take that step forward we force ourselves into a dependence on God that wouldn’t be possible if we just sat on the edge of cliff....waiting.

We are God's people, and his promises in the Bible endure forever.

Hebrews 11:6 It's impossible to please God apart from faith. And why? Because anyone who wants to approach God must believe both that he exists and that he cares enough to respond to those who seek him.

In fact, if you want to feel energized, just read Hebrews 11.  All of Hebrews 11.  It is an amazing account of time after time when people stepped out in Faith!

feed my starving children

 18,000 children die of starvation or starvation related causes each day!

$88.00 will feed one child for an entire year.

$264.00 will feed two children, and their mother for an entire year.

$440.00 will feed a family of five for an entire year.

$4,380.00 will feed 100 children in an orphanage for six months.

Those numbers are pretty staggering.  18,000 children die every day in the world due to starvation, or starvation related causes.

For only $88.00 USD a one of those children would have food for an entire year!  That is only $7.33 per month or $1.69 per week.

Think about it, only $1.69 per week could save a child!  That is pretty humbling.  Especially as I reach through the drive-through window at my local Starbucks.  This one cup of coffee could feed so many!

My Husband and I took our family to volunteer for Feed my Starving Children on Saturday.

If you do not know about this amazing organization, I have a link to their site on the right hand side of my blog, please click on it to find out more.

I have to say that I LOVE, LOVE, LOVED it.  It was such a great experience.  Not to mention the fact that after our 2-hour shift - our group had packed enough food to feed 29 Children for ONE YEAR!

I would highly recommend, if you have a Feed my Starving Children location near you....GO!!  If you do not, then you can still support this amazing organization financially.

and with this step...

If I had to sum up the past few weeks in one word....that word would have to be WOW.

Yea, just WOW.

I have made some major changes in my life - some that I was planning - others that I was not.

I took a major step outside of my comfort zone. 

I am leaving my job in the corporate world, and have accepted a job with my Church.

Now, with that change comes a ripple-effect of change touching a lot of areas in our life.  One, is the financial aspect.  I will be taking a pay cut.  Churches/Non-Profits, etc. can not compete with Corporate Wages.  However, even with that I am excited with the change. 

I know that this is what God wants me to do, and when you are in His will.....there is this feeling of peace He provides that goes beyond my understanding.

I am excited too because the schedule will allow me additional time with my Husband (one on one) and also with all of my Family together.

This is important, since most of my working life - I put my career/job first.....and they had to deal with the left overs.

Now, God has dealt with me on that issue...a lot.  I say a lot because I didn't listen at first.  I had reason after reason as to why my life had to be the way it was.

However, He finally reached me about 3 years ago.....and I am so glad He did.  It was not overnight, but over the past 3 years my heart has changed, my priorities have changed, and in turn my life has changed.

When I gave my notice, my boss thought I was crazy.  He can not believe I would give up any amount of money, in fact he tried to buy me to stay.  He didn't understand that it was not about the money.

Will I have times of fear?  Yes, because my mind thinks on one level..  However, when I take that fear out, and look at it, I realize one thing. 

God is my provider, not me.

I need to make sure my heart stays in the right place, and the rest will fall into its proper place.  Not that we wont go through trials, or tough times - life is life.  But, God will be there to sustain us in our minds, and in our spirits. 

Really, all you have to say is God will be there.

Casting the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully. 1 Peter 5:7

i have my now

As life continues to change, I continue to adapt.  Yesterday, I had a slurry of 'things' that I had to do which are not in my normal routine or even my semi-normal routine.

I had to take a couple online skill tests as well as a personality assessment test. 

Now, let me just say....I do not like tests.

First of all they make me nervous.  Especially online tests.  If you click on the wrong thing....that's it.  You get one chance to make the right decision. 

Second, I start to second guess myself.   Especially if I have not done it in awhile.

Now, in life, if I am presented a situation that I am not sure of - I am fine.  I simply think about it, and research if necessary.  If at first I do not succeed, I have no problem in trying again.

However, when it's the type of test that allows for no 'try's' well it does get to me.  At times I just found myself staring at the question.  Trying to recall the ways I had done it in the past, feeling the time slip by, tick...tock....

The personality assessment was a different story.  I actually enjoy these, however, I usually have the frustration of.....what if none of these are ME - yet I have to select the one most like me?? 

Or they group two words together.  One is like me, the other not at all.  Such as Competitive/Likes to be Challenged.  Well, I for one love a good challenge - however I am really NOT competitive.

In any case - I learned a lot about myself through this process, or in some cases re-learned.

I was definitely outside my comfort zone.

What will come of these tests?  Only God knows right now.  All I could do was the best with my present, what was right in front of me at the time.

I use to obsess about things like this.  I would spend hours rehashing whatever just happened, and then hours trying to speculate what that would mean for the future.

And, through the day I was reminded of something a performance coach once told me.

We were sitting in a conference room.  He got up, walked over to the white board and He drew an 'X'

This is your past.  It is done, finished.  There is absolutely nothing you can do to change it.  You 'can' obsess about it, regret it, but you can never change it.

Then he drew another 'X' about a foot away from the previous one.

This is your future.  It has not happened yet.  You can fear it, obsess about it, try to speculate what 'will' happen....but you have no way of 'knowing' what will happen...because it is the future.

Then he drew a line between the two 'X's'

This is your present.  This is what you have.  Every decision you make now, right at this moment will either be one you end up looking back and regretting or not.

This moment, never stopping, pausing or freezing for you.  It's ever moving and as soon as it is gone.....it's done.

You can wast your entire life looking at the past and regretting what you have done, and you can waste your entire life fearing and speculating about the future.  If you do this, you will go nowhere.

Or, you can choose to learn from the past.  Acknowledge failure, loss, missed opportunities  - but keep focus on you present.  Make decisions based on fact not speculation. 


You know when you place your hand on a hot stove it will burn you because you did it before - so don't do it again.  You would think it was ridiculous if you saw someone repeatedly touch the hot stove over and over.  Kicking themselves because, once again, they failed and burned themselves but not learning.  Or, they sit there with a burned hand and just stare at it hour after hour.....instead of getting up treating it and moving on.

We have all heard people talk about 'licking wounds'.  When you think about it, it has it's place.  An animal will lick a wound to heal it.  However, if they continually lick the wound - and just wont stop.  That wound will never heal properly. 

The same with us.  If we fail, and just sit in the corner and lick our wounds, how will we ever move forward?

I have spent way too much of my life sitting there, looking at my past, obsessing about it.  Afraid to look at my present or my future because my focus was my past.  What bondage that is.

Instead of acknowledging my past, keeping my focus on my present and what I CAN do now, not what I CAN'T do, and then taking the future as it comes.

It's amazing what focus can do.

Oh, it's not easy.  You will be tested at first a lot.  You will want to look back in self-pity and regret, or forward with fear....but you have no control over either.

There is ONE thing you can control though.

One thing and that is.....

How you react to your reality, your now, this moment....

God, well He is totally capable of handling everything else.

completely unearned

John 14:27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

What an amazing gift we have, Jesus' love.  So undeserved, so unearned.  What peace it gives us when we know this. When we realize that no matter what the problem is, no matter how high the mountain, how low the valley, He is there and loves us so much.

There is no one that is more precious than another.  Not one of us who have earned the amazing gift of grace.  

In fact, even though we fail, sin, and wander - a lot - He still loves us.

It is so easy for me to get wrapped up in everything that is wrong, to get caught up in all the stuff around me.  

But there is nothing, absolutely nothing that I have done or will do that will surprise Him.

There will never be a time when I will go to God, on my knees and confess a sin that He will say to me....hmmmm well, when I sent my Son to die for your sins....I was not really thinking about 'that'...sooo ahh yea - never mind.


It just wont happen.


He died for us while we were 'still' sinners.....He won't be caught off guard, we can't surprise Him with a situation that he was not expecting.....just can't be done.


The world gives us that....'conditional' sin/acceptance/forgiveness......

God gives us perfect Love and Complete Forgiveness.

How beautiful!!  How amazing!!   How blessed we are!!

embracing the mundane

It's during the mundane that the amazing happens.

Really, think about it.

Did David wake up thinking he was going to kill a Giant that day?

Really, it was probably just an ordinary day.  In fact, it may have been an ordinary day - turned annoying - turned triumphant.

Why?

Well, think about it.  He woke up, probably had chores to do, sheep to tend, etc.  Then his Dad asks him to basically go on a food-delivery run for his brothers who were fighting the Philistines.  This then set a series of events into motion that ended up with David defeating Goliath.

Moses.

He had fled Egypt, doing his regular thing, minding his own business - just another day - when a Burning Bush talked to him.....which then set another series of events into motion that changed the world.

Could it be, that we have opportunities every day to do amazing things - but miss them because we are so busy grumbling about our 'have-to' lists, or feeling sorry for ourselves because our work is mundane and ordinary - not exciting and fun?

Are we missing Amazing because we are too busy looking outside of our current situation, instead of inside?

Are we waiting for Amazing to be dropped in our laps, when it is right under our feet - if we would just look?


I believe that it's right smack in the middle of the mundane the extraordinary lies - we just have to have our eyes ready to see it.

GREAT OPPORTUNITIES ARE HIDDEN AMONG THE SMALL MENIAL TASKS.

Galatians 6:3 If you think you are too important to help someone, you are only fooling yourself. You are not that important.

Jesus himself came to serve, nothing was beneath him.

John 13:15 I have given you an example to follow. Do as I have done to you.

So, today - when I get behind the slowest person ever at the checkout lane.....instead of getting frustrated, I should think of what is around me, look for that hidden opportunity in the mundane.

Is there someone I should help?  Talk to? Does God just want me to slow down a bit so he can have a moment?

Embrace the mundane, you never know what extraordinary opportunity may be right under your nose.

color me failure

How often do you color a situation in your mind before you live it?  I think we all do at one time or another.  We pull out our mental crayons and begin to scribble in the lines with what we 'think' will be the right colors, never bothering to think that we may be wrong.

How often do we drag our past baggage into a situation in our lives where it just does not belong?  Because we see it as a Kevlar-Vest of sorts to 'shield' us from being hurt.  As if everyone is out there, poised to take any opportunity they get to throw the first dart.

How often, by doing these things, are we undermining opportunities in our lives? Only to look back and think - "I 'knew' that would not work", "I 'knew' they would end up hurting me". 

Really?   You 'knew'?

Or is it, we sabotaged opportunities and situations in our lives before they even have a chance to become anything more than failure?

Oh, I am not saying that you should not be cautious, but I am saying that we should not be all too ready to be the cynic or judge in every situation.

I lived so much of my life being both.

A cynic and a judge.

Neither role was right for me.

Both brought pain, and loss.

I was the queen of being able to somehow, 'know' what people were thinking.  When, in reality, I was only casting my 'fears' of what I 'thought' they were thinking - unfairly.

Who knows how many opportunities I may have missed along the road?  How may people I pre-judged and never allowed the opportunity to see the beauty they hold?  Only God knows for sure.


We have to learn to live each moment for what it is.

Sometimes we will get hurt.

Sometimes we wont.

Sometimes we will learn something about ourselves.

Sometimes we will learn something about someone else.

Each is an opportunity.  A unique, and special opportunity.

Fear will keep us back, judging, casting our fears on the situation and coloring it failure before it even has a chance to become anything else.

So, when I look at a situation now that bristles my inner porcupine....I do the following.

Stop

Breath

Pray

Identify what my 'fear' is.

Honestly look at that fear and see if it is based on a past experience that is coloring my view, or if there is a tangible fear that I need to address.

Acknowledge what the opportunity could teach me or what it can do for others.

Ask God for wisdom.

Walk into the situation with a teachable heart, leaving all preconditions and past hurts at the door, and embrace the situation for what IT is, not for the color I chose.

Fear: False Evidence Appearing Real.
~Unknown

what makes you uncomfortable?

What makes you uncomfortable?  What makes you shrug up your shoulders and squint up your eyes when you thing about it?

Everyone has something.

When you feel compassion towards someone or something, you want to help, you want to do something.

Then the fear, doubt, and discouragement starts.

You could never do that!

You are not smart enough!

You do not have the resources.

No one will understand, and they may think you are crazy!

These are just some of the voices we hear in our head when we make a decision to step outside of our comfort zone.

Where do these voices come from?

Why are they so quick to surface?

How do they know exactly what to say?

Here is the answer.

It's the enemy.  Pure and simple.

He has the spirit of fear and knows exactly how to use it on each and every one of us. 

He is an expert, and has been honing his craft for centuries upon centuries.

He is an aggressive anti-supporter who will tear out of the gate at all expense. 

He knows, when you step to the edge and peer out over the boundaries of your comfort zone, with that inquisitive look....it's time to act.

He knows, those first few minutes, hours, days are the most crucial.

If he can stop you there, he has won.

He throws everything he can at you, because he knows the importance of an attack that just keeps coming.

He wears you down until you just....give up.

So, what can be done?  How can you defeat such a cunning and determined foe?

One word....Prayer.

It is amazing what is available to us through Prayer.

Its amazing the power prayer has.

It seems too simple.

Too easy.

The enemy will try to convince you that it is not worth it.  How can words, simple words matter?

You are dealing with 'reality' right?

He will do everything to keep you from praying.

You may feel too tired to pray.....that's when you pray more.

You may feel too defeated to pray.....that's when you pray more.

You may feel too sinful and unworthy to pray.....that's when you pray more.

We may fall victim to fear, however the enemy has no defense against prayer.

Its not because our words are so powerful.

Its not because we have power in and of ourselves.

It's simply because our prayers are to Jesus.  

The one who has defeated him before, and will defeat him once and for all in the future.

The one who's name strikes fear into the very being who wields it to destroy His followers.

The Enemy wins if we allow his fear and lies to overcome and paralyze us.

Jesus wins the moment we look to Him, and say we are weak, suffering, and call on His name for refuge, help, comfort, peace.

So, when you start to feel the fear in a situation.

Pray

When you start to feel defeated

Pray

When you start to feel weary

Pray

When you start to feel victory

Pray and rejoice

restless minds

 
I have this entire week off of work.   Our company closes twice a year, once the week of the 4th of July and the other the week of Christmas.  It is great for me because my kids are home from school during both times, but strange also since I am use to working, a lot.

God has been dealing with me over the past three years, and He has come a long way in teaching me how to balance work with family. 

For so long I poured myself into work, and the family - well they got the rest....the leftovers.

There are many reasons why I did this - but one of them was for how 'good' it felt for me.

You see work, (for the most part) was controllable to me.  I could control much of my surroundings, my projects, how I portrayed myself.  I reveled in the praise these accomplishments brought and strove for greater responsibility (and pay).  Then, when I received either one, I had to pour more of myself into work, which just by basic math resulted in less of 'me' for my family.

My family ended up with the left-overs, of the left-overs - both in time and in my emotions and attention.

This was my way for years, and years, and years.  I laughed at the idea of 'submission', to me that was outdated and for the weak.  And, if I was to label myself it would have been 'Christian Feminist'.

How much I see now, those are two words that should never be grouped together.  I understand now, I am nothing in and of myself.  I also understand that it is not 'weak' to be submissive, just the opposite in fact - it takes a very STRONG person.  Humble is not a put down, but something to be sought after.

So now, I find myself at home, without the obligation to check into work or finish a project before I play.  It feels odd, but at the same time liberating and nice.

Last night, however, I was restless.  My evening and my subsequent dreams that night - - even my prayers this morning.  I felt like all of my thoughts were in a giant mix-master and I was just watching them spin around hoping to see something I could reach in and grab that made sense to me.

We have had so much change this year, and there is still more to come.  Some things that I am fully aware of, and others that I simply have a 'feeling' are about to change, the burbling before the announcements.  I think that was part of the 'restless' feelings.

The other part is the fact that I still struggle to let it all go to God.  I still want to control, map out, script, full knowing that I can't.

So, today I decided to try to relax.  I went to the pool with my Mother and Kids and just 'chilled'.

The restlessness has subsided a bit.  Not because of my pool time, but because it allowed me to slow down enough to remember a few things.

God has not let me down yet....and He never will.

It is not about the things, or even people around me.  My relationship is with God - the wonderful people and things that are in my life are just passing.

A gift from God - - for just a time as this.

Sometimes you meet awesome people, who help you become a better person - only for those people to move on.  You keep them in your hearts, but that time....that special time....was just "   " there - it was never meant to be forever.

The constant is God.  It always has been, and forever will be.

Thank you God for being my Constant....even when I was not looking at you, or even for you.  You were still there.  The same yesterday, today, and forever.

he is your remedy

I love this song, and it really spoke to me today. So here is my Friday Song.

Remedy by David Crowder Band

Here we are

Here we are

The broken and used

Mistreated, abused

Here we are

Here You are

Here You are

The beautiful one

Who came like a Son

Here You are

So we lift up our voices

We open our hands

To cling to the love

That we can't comprehend

Oh, lift up your voices

And lift up your heads

To sing of the love

That has freed us from sin

He is the one

Who has saved us

He is the one

Who embraced us

He is the one who has come

And is coming again

He's the remedy

Here we are

Here we are

Bandaged and bruised

Awaiting a cure

Here we are

Here You are

Here You are

Our beautiful King

Bringing relief

Here You are with us

So we lift up our voices

And open our hands

Let go of the things

That have kept us from Him

He is the one

Who has saved us

He is the one

Who forgave us

He is the one who has come

And is coming again

He's the remedy

Oh, I can't comprehend

I can't take it all in

Never understand

Such perfect love come

For the broken and beat

For the wounded and weak

Oh, come fall at His feet

He's the remedy

He's the remedy

So sing, sing

You are the one

Who has saved us

You are the one

Who forgave us

You are the one who has come

And is coming again

To make it alright

Oh, to make it alright

You're the remedy

Oh, in us

You're the remedy

Let us be the remedy

Let us bring the remedy