We received some news last night that kicked me in the gut. I have been asking God to intervene ever since. My heart is heavy and my faith is weak. However, I will not cave.
I will not cave to the flesh. I will keep my eyes on Jesus. I will keep my faith, however flickering the flame is in the storm, lit. I will not turn away. I will not loose hope. I will continue to know my God will provide.
If there is one thing that I am realizing through my journey - is that God is more powerful than anything. He is not bound by any power. His power is above all else.
This is hard for me to grasp. Because, I think - how can he be above all - what about finances - what about institutions made by man who are under rules and regulations that were created by man and enforced by man....how can that be?
Then I realize - I will never understand it all. God is beyond my understanding and grasp. He is God. He is. There is really nothing else to say but that.
To even try to make sense of what he can and cant do....is futile.
Because it is not a question of what he can or cant do. It is what he will or will not do.
And the reasons why he will or will not - well that is God.
Everything is under his power and dominion.
Thank you God. Thank you for finally making me realize that if I could ever understand you, if I could ever figure you out....that would mean I would have to reduce you to my mind. You are so far above anything I can comprehend.
I am still waiting to see how this situation will pan out. But, I have faith in God that he is there, I am not alone, he hears my heart and he knows the plan.
I am still asking God to intervene, and I believe that he is working in ways I can not see. If anything this situation, this problem, has for the first time in my life - brought me to the realization that he is there, he is here, he is with me - and I have to let it go to him that he knows best and will provide.
Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow now reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father fees them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? Andy why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is live and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? Therefore do not be anxious, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. Matthew 6:25-34 (ESV)
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